What a day! What a long emotional day.
I was told by many friends, colleagues and even ocasional people that have seen my work (always surprises me that people that have never seen me before follow my work) that I should keep the emotional side of my blog and it is inspiring in a way so thats what I am going to keep doing.See.. I dont actually know anyone more emotional than me. It becomes slightly pathetic sometimes. I have insecurities like any other human being but probably with a bit more of spice. My father is a very emotional man, very moralistic and he bought me up to think about things very carefully, to think of my next step 10 times before taking it and to believe in the good in people. Now, I am not very good (terrible in fact) at separating my emotional life with my images. I think I mentioned in a previous post that I use this as an advantage to create more intense pictures (all of this has a point..please keep reading).
Today I shot 2 models, 2 very very different models. Masha was one of the most confident and sexy girls that I have worked with. You know when you meet people that aspire confidence? She was one of them. Yuliya, 15 years old, very new in the business had just been signed with Leni's and said about 4 words. She was so sweet, very simetrical features, it was deja vu to new faces test shooting for the first time. Now, I didnt shoot them together , separate sets , separate things. It was so interesting to see the different interactions , the different atitude between these 2 girls. Id swap between them (4 times) and it was like I was in a completely different zone, a completely different planet every time. Made me think about people in general: their "here I am" atitude and their "stepping into relatively new territory" persona. It specially made me think about me, as a person. As I said above, I was brought up to think and constantly analise everything around me so thats why I ended up taking the whole situation and creating a metaphor out of it. Everything has the same cycle: your young, you know you like something or someone, you take a chance, your scared but you know you have it in you..until one day it blossoms and you have no longer doubts about what you are doing. You know every bit of your body and brain to move fwd to whatever goal you are reaching. So these 2 girls were at absolutely oposite points but they both new what they wanted.
We all start somewhere, we all get scared, we all grow, make mistakes, learn from them until we are comfortable enough to pursue whatever it is we wanted in the first place. If you are starting with photography, you will enter in full speed, have full faith, probably think you're the best in class and one day you'll brake, you'l think your work is crap, until you find it in you to get your pieces together and start again. Its how everything in life works and that is the best bit of it all: The realisation. Thats why I believe everything happens for a reason, that if the model doesnt show on that day, its simply because It's not meant to be, things sometimes..are just not meant to happen. Other example: the MUA is crap! but thats when you find the force in you to make that shoot worth it. You will get that moment at the right time and you will create a beautiful image. (I cant complain, I had a wicked MUA Tabby Casto and Hair stylist Katie Wilton today HA!).
As you see, I am pretty emotional and I think that work, love.. well life itself works in funny ways, and I try my best to go with the flow.. and boy it feels good when it makes sense, which in the end it always does.
Image: Masha Shafry
MUA: Tabby Casto
Hair: Katie Wilton
Special thanks to Tery for the help :)x
